When Baby Finds Bladder

So my son is moving a lot more now... and it all seems to be on my bladder. This new, strange and highly uncomfortable experience has made me utter such polite phrases as "hey, get off of there you little f@!#er" and "little sh@t, I do not have time to go to the bathroom right now!"

It first happened two days ago while at work. I get to work before everyone else does, so I'm quiety doing my reports and eating my oatmeal when I suddenly feel a sensation not unlike the strange twingy pain you get when you have a bladder/urinary tract infection. Haven't had one of those before? Okay, imagine a guitar string that starts about 2 inches below your navel and extends to your nether regions that's already pulled too tight, but someone tries to twang it anyway. That's what I mean by twingy pain. It makes you fold over just a bit and want to run to the toilet. So I'm sitting there and I feel this and I think, "is that what pregnant women mean when they say the kid kicks your bladder?" And, god love my little son, he gave me another kick to confirm... yes, that was indeed the body part he had chosen to practice his future soccer career on.

It happened on and off all day Monday and I suddenly realized that there will be times that I won't enjoy his movement... and this is one of them. Today, however, was even worse. He gave me a reprieve yesterday and then decided today that a mere kick here and there would not do. No, he decided to treat my bladder as an all-day trampoline or punching bag. I don't think I've ever wasted so much of a work day walking back and forth to the bathroom. And the real bitch is... most of the time I don't have to go... I just feel like I have to because William (my son) thinks that mom's bladder is his new toy. I keep thinking I'd like him to switch to another organ, but then I wonder... will it just be worse?